Marriage Material

I recenty attended my best friend's wedding in India and something kind of funny happened. I entered the reception and seeing my friend standing by the stage, I headed towards him and said Hi. He was in conversation with another guy and as soon as I showed up, he immediately turned to him and said
"Oh yeah, this is the girl I was telling you about."
I continue to stare with a pleasant smile since I wasn't quite sure what there was to tell about me.
Gladly, my friend cleared that up
"She's the single one."
Ohhhhhh. Thats what there was to tell. Silly me, I didn't realize it was normal to tell complete strangers about the fact that I wasn't married. How about the fact that I wasn't really groom-hunting?

Lately, pretty much all my friends seem to be heading down this joyous road and they absolutely want me to have the same joy they have, bless all of them.

I'm going to skip the part with the cliched uncles and overbearing aunts who want to know when you plan to do it and when they could wink wink dance at your wedding. Seriously, just for that I will not get married. Coz to see you dance would be more torture than to be single.

Being in my late 20s, (At some point I realized I could not pass off 26 as "mid" anymore) with all my girlfriends married puts pressure on me to be the next one. Society, media, parents, friends, and sadly, I do too. It's easy to get caught up and feel insecure about your life. Somehow, that one question combined with the right look just makes all your other accomplishments feel insignificant.

Interestingly, I have heard a variety of reasons for which I choose to be not married. Here are the top 3:

1. I am not the marrying kind. Yes, seriously. I have friends who tell me they don't see me as the marrying kind. Great, so basically, they don't see me stable, happy and commited. Excellent reason.
2. Right now, I'm just at a place in my life where I don't want to be tied down. Well, you seem to have gotten over it.
3. I am so strong and independent, I don't need a man. Amen to that. I definitely don't need a man, I just want one.

My friends have advice on meeting men, being on your best behaviour and doing the very best you can to get a Yes. My question is, why am I waiting for a Yes? Who decided that I am selling and men are buying? Why is it up to the women to make a case and for men to decide whether it's a win or a loss?

So in addition to the questions and impromptu matchmaking, theres also a lot of thoughts on why we choose to be..the way we are. Well, people, from me and all the other single ladies..

The reason I am not married is not because I don't want to be tied down.
Not because I am strong and independent.
And definitely not because I am not the marrying kind.

This post is not a rant or some subtle attack at married people. I love married people, infact people are people whether they are single or married, I like some, I dislike some. Also, I am not a man hating lesbian who is out to bust balls.

The reason I am not married yet is because I want to choose the right man and I want to decide the right time. It's as simple as that.

Coz, honestly, I am the marrying kind.